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How I Find Balance When Indulgences Become a Habit

Submitted by Angelina Ng

After a long, stressful, week of classes, I found myself rewarding my small behaviors a little too much. It would bring me so much joy in such an easy process: find something I like, take out my card, and now I have it! There are some small indulgences I would do after I complete a task: go out and buy a snack, go to small shops and buy some jewelry, allow myself to eat more snacks, or get a large drink from Dunkin Donuts. These small actions definitely made me feel accomplished for my hard work throughout the week, but it eventually started to feel costly and I knew it was time for a change.

As I ended my second year of college, I knew that my third year would only get worse. Taking harder classes, participating in additional extracurriculars, joining an executive board for a club, and staying on top of utility and bill charges for my house at UD. Throughout the summer, it was difficult for me to find a job, but I knew I needed to take action if I wanted to spend like I used to. I was only able to work at a shop, but summer was already halfway through. I started to realize that I need to budget and come up with a plan, so I can stay up to date with my money and my satisfaction.

I started to understand and think about my long-term goals and the issues I would run into if I were to keep up my indulgences. I learned that it was too stressful to keep up with my spending with the little earnings I would make bi-weekly. 

When I began my third year of college, I would return to my on-campus job. I began to change my attitude and how I thought about every shift. This year, time management and independence were a large factor for me to take into consideration. I felt that I was occupied and spent more time working for what I wanted. I was able to find balance by participating in activities or events where I could have fun or feel productive. Instead of rewarding myself after small accomplishments, I set a checklist every week and visualize my plan for the upcoming week with assignments, club events, activities, research meetings, exams, and more. Visually, when I see myself checking off everything at the end of the week, I feel accomplished. I was also really proud of myself and would express my accomplishments to family and friends. With social support, I felt happy and wanted to continue.

However, there were times in which I felt that I wasn’t treating myself the way I wanted to be treated. Most of the time, my spendings would be on groceries or school-related items. I ended up feeling sad that I was not able to give myself what I truly wanted. I felt guilty spending my money on a five-dollar pastry but would feel even more guilty that I couldn’t get myself what I wanted. 

With lots of thought and emotional stress, I noticed that I would talk to friends or attend events that would make me happy. Additionally, I would spend many days walking around campus or finding different places to study at. I found a different way to feel less stressed and I realized that spending quality time with myself and others was a way I could also feel happy. On occasion, I would go and get a snack with others, and I would feel more comfortable with spending my money since I get to have quality time with others.

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