Am I Becoming a Karen Like My Asian Parents?
Submitted by Michelle Ewton
Growing up in a strict Asian family, I always told myself that I wanted to be different from my parents. When they said to do chores everyday or week, I wanted to do them whenever I saw fit. When they said to do what you need to right away, I wanted to do it later. When they said to get what you paid for, no matter the price, I wanted to not care. When they said bad dad jokes, I didn’t want to be near to hear them. When they asked me if I ate yet or if I wanted to eat more, I wanted them to stop asking.
While I moved away from home for college, though, I find myself doing the things that my parents told me growing up or doing the same exact things they do. Maybe it’s not at the same level or intensity as them, but slowly it feels as though my inner Asian tiger mom is starting to come out. Do you have to be a mom to be a tiger mom? I’d argue not; it’s more about the vibes that you give off sometimes.
Now, I try to stick to a schedule for chores. There’s a bit of guilt when I don’t do them. Sometimes though, the feeling of not caring outweighs the guilt, but I’ll still feel guilty nonetheless. Other times, the feeling of guilt wins and suddenly I’m scrubbing the bathroom in the middle of the night to make up for it. Not exactly what my parents envisioned for me, but close enough.
Whenever we go to the store, my parents always look over the receipt to make sure that they are paying exactly what they owe. If something was double scanned, they would make sure to go back even if we already left the parking lot. I didn’t understand too much and thought they were making a big deal out of nothing when I was younger. Now, though, I’m very conscious of how much I’m spending and while I feel shy about asking for something, I feel like I should say it. Or at least I have good friends who will do it for me. Thanks guys <3.
Do you ever go to a family party and uncle and aunt are like, “Who are you? OOOHH you’re [insert name here]?!?! I didn’t recognize you, you were like two feet tall the last time I saw you!!!” They say it every time too, even if you saw them a week ago. I’m not really starting to say those jokes, but sometimes I find myself saying something similar. Then I stop and think about my life and start having a crisis in the middle of the birthday party, but you have to pretend that you’re okay when really you’re not fine. Suddenly the joke is on you huh.
So maybe I don’t completely fit the mold of Karen yet, but with due time anything can happen. Not sure if I should be looking forward to the day it happens, but it feels a little inevitable. If it does happen one day, I hope to be a kind Karen.
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