How I Felt Moving Away from my Asian Parents

Dear Diary, 

Today is September 20th, 2022, almost a month since I left home. It’s been a while since I moved away and I miss it, but at the time I don’t miss it at all. Before this, I had never lived away from my parents. Heck, I haven’t ever even had a sleepover with anyone other than my cousin. I’ve never gone more than two day without seeing my parents. I’m a junior now, but before this I commuted from home to school and then back home again. I saw my parents everyday, and I have a good relationship with them. Sometimes it could feel a little suffocating, but at the same time I know it’s because they care about me. 

Things have changed since the semester started. For starters, I don’t have to tell my parents the day before that I’ll be out with friends for a couple hours. It feels so liberating leaving without needing to tell someone where I’ll be and if I’m coming home for dinner. But then at the same time it feels a little sad thinking no one is waiting for me. And then I get more sad thinking about having to make dinner myself. On the bright side, my parents taught me how to cook so I can whip up anything that reminds me of home whenever I want. The complex dishes that take hours to make will be missed though. I’m craving my mom’s pho and banh xeo. On the other hand though, I can make the food that I like and try out new cuisines that I haven’t made before because my parents don’t like to try new things. 

Even though I have moved out of my parent’s house, I still want to live with some of the standards that they raised me with. One of the  biggest things that they taught me was cleanliness. I think that there is a big difference between thinking that you’re clean and actually being clean. I thought that I was a clean person before moving, but maybe I should listen to my mom more. Now, I’m incorporating more things that she told me constantly before. Like to swipe down the stove and counters after cooking. Do the dishes before going to sleep. Don’t leave the remote on the couch because you’re gonna lose it to the cushions. If my mom taught me cleanliness, my dad taught me how to be independent and problem solve. There are times when things go wrong or not how we intended in the dorm. My dad showed me how to think outside the box and make do with what I have. Things don’t have to be used with their intended purpose, you can manipulate objects to do what you want sometimes. 

Do I miss my parents? Yes, I do. Do I miss them enough to live with them instead of in a dorm? No, not really. Right now I’m finding out more new things about myself that I don’t think that I would have realized if I didn’t have this new sense of independence. Instead of staying in a small bubble under the protection of my parents, I’m meeting more people and building new experiences. When I do miss my parents, they’re only a call away. Perhaps I should call them more often though, they’re starting to pick up on how much I love living away from home. Oopsies.